I need a veggie pizza. Stat.

[nick_garou]

Not a whole lot has happened during my Cougar-time. I got a lot of thinking done and a lot of practice making the cougar-body work better and more efficiently. I'm pretty confident with what I am and (perhaps more importantly) am not capable of doing with that body. It's peculiar, really. I exercise (parkour, yoga, balancing) as a human because it might be useful in getting the hell out of Dodge some day, but I exercise as a cougar because I actually enjoy the activity. Perhaps this is because there's more mental stimulation/challenge in making a foreign body move than there is making my own body move? Perhaps I should just enjoy it and not ask stupid questions?

I got a call back from Salem. Voice mail. He seemed a little wigged out from my voice mail--cougar-voice. Told me not to use that voice again around him. He's from Soviet-Land, where they've got things like Siberian tigers, which means they'd probably have Khan out there, too. I bet Salem's had a run-in with a tiger-shifter sometime in the past. I'll have to ask him about it later. Also, Salem's in for doing guard duty for me, but he recommends a thinner moon. Proooobably a good idea.

Sunday night, I was starving and decided to throw in the towel. I took a circular route back towards my house--don't want anyone tracking me--and bumped into Slug. He was in glabro and climbing trees so he could hang bells at the top to appease/entertain ravens and crows. I'm not entirely sure I see the logic to that, but.... Best not to point out that it's silly. I think, actually, that Slug knows it's silly and he's simply doing it for his own amusement. We got to talking about thinking and guilt and whatnot. He seems to think that if there was a flip you could switch to stop feeling guilt, that would be a good thing. I said it wouldn't be as guilt helps people self-reflect on the merits of their own actions. A little guilt isn't a bad thing. Overwhelming guilt, particularly for things that can't be changed or learned from, isn't productive  and can be self destructive.

Val swung by, attracted by the bells in the trees (because Val), and joined us. She and Slug started talking about the metis Fianna who'd frenzied in public and killed a person (thanks to me--great job there, Nick!) in the park. His name is Fitz. There's talk of a philodox maybe punishing him, although Val and Slug didn't seem to know who would do it or what the punishment might be--could be anything from nothing to death. Quite the range there.

Guilt? A little bit. I think it'll depend on Fitz's punishment. If there is none, I'll feel marginal guilt for being a unwitting and inadvertent catalyst in the events that led to that jogger's death. If Fitz gets punished with anything other than permanent maiming or death, I won't feel any guilt for that--the kid killed a human after all. If Fitz is to be maimed or executed, I might need to intervene. Maybe.

Maybe getting Fitz off the street is the same as getting rid of the next Riot, just at an earlier stage before the asshole gets turned loose and starts accumulating power and becoming a giant asshole bully?

I took an even more circuitous path to get back to my house afterwards, doubling back a couple times to make sure Slug wasn't following, and eventually arrived home. Ordered a deep-dish veggie lover pizza. Changed LOLcat's litter (GOOD GOD, MAN!), ran a bath with lots of soap (I smelled of cat), and fell asleep in the tub.
Monday.... What to do? What to do?