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Monday evening, I bailed on humanity, took the form of a cougar (after to tending to LOLcat), and vanished into the wilderness. Specifically, I departed for the pine-engulfed valley in the heart of the Walkers' woodland territory. Almost no one ever goes there but me, so it's a good place to go and think without interruption.
Usually.
Tuesday morning a lynx turned up on the treeline with a rabbit in its jaws while I was meditating by the mirrored pool below. I watched it a while out of the corner of my eye, afraid to move lest I disrupt it. And then some kind of buzzing happened, which seemed out of the ordinary, so I went and scanned it. I was going to use my paw to gesticulate, helping to focus my magic, but then I tried gesturing with my tail instead. It seemed to work. Cats are more expressive with their tails, so that'll be less attention-drawing in the future.
Results of said scan? Lynx-shifter and an accompanying minor spirit. Didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out who it likely was: Trixie. She 'd spotted me by then--likely from my moving about. I broke out my English speech in Cougar form, courtesy of a little Forces magick, to manipulate the noises I made into speech--nicely feline-accented speech so it sounds like it's coming out of a cougar (because it technically is) instead of a human. It's pretty cool. I was not able to understand the language she used, but just reading surface thoughts is enough to understand what's being said just before it's verbalized--but it looks like I understand what's being said, even if I can't speak it back.
We talked a while in an extraordinarily circuitous manner that led practically nowhere. Sees-Behind-Mirrors is what Trixie goes by. She claimed I was not of her kind, which I think means she does not believe me to be a bastet--but something other. I claimed it didn't matter what I was or was not and told her I was allied with Gaian forces. (Which isn't entirely true, but from the 60,000' perspective it's good enough. I cautioned her that she was in wolves' territory where I had permission to be but she didn't. She didn't seem to really care all that much, saying (essentially) that the wolves just stole most of the land they now claim anyway--and nearly drove those who'd been there earlier to extinction. I mentioned that it was simply in their nature to fight and destroy, that they sometimes couldn't help it, and that the only wolves worth knowing were the ones who expressed remorse over this flaw they had.
The conversation ended shortly thereafter, with the lynx going to collect her kill and head deeper into the woods; however, I was left dwelling upon the words I'd spoken: "it's in their nature to fight and destroy." They are destructive and full of rage. Every one of them. And had that bully from the other day been just a random human like I'd thought, that jogger would still be alive. Put a garou in the mix and it became deadly. Not because of me, but because of the garou. That man's death is his fault, not mine. However, that doesn't fully absolve me. In the future, before I intervene on anyone's behalf, I must make a policy of scanning first prior to employing magick.
I feel substantially less burdened by guilt now, even though it is still terrible that someone died. His death is not on my hands.
Usually.
Tuesday morning a lynx turned up on the treeline with a rabbit in its jaws while I was meditating by the mirrored pool below. I watched it a while out of the corner of my eye, afraid to move lest I disrupt it. And then some kind of buzzing happened, which seemed out of the ordinary, so I went and scanned it. I was going to use my paw to gesticulate, helping to focus my magic, but then I tried gesturing with my tail instead. It seemed to work. Cats are more expressive with their tails, so that'll be less attention-drawing in the future.
Results of said scan? Lynx-shifter and an accompanying minor spirit. Didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out who it likely was: Trixie. She 'd spotted me by then--likely from my moving about. I broke out my English speech in Cougar form, courtesy of a little Forces magick, to manipulate the noises I made into speech--nicely feline-accented speech so it sounds like it's coming out of a cougar (because it technically is) instead of a human. It's pretty cool. I was not able to understand the language she used, but just reading surface thoughts is enough to understand what's being said just before it's verbalized--but it looks like I understand what's being said, even if I can't speak it back.
We talked a while in an extraordinarily circuitous manner that led practically nowhere. Sees-Behind-Mirrors is what Trixie goes by. She claimed I was not of her kind, which I think means she does not believe me to be a bastet--but something other. I claimed it didn't matter what I was or was not and told her I was allied with Gaian forces. (Which isn't entirely true, but from the 60,000' perspective it's good enough. I cautioned her that she was in wolves' territory where I had permission to be but she didn't. She didn't seem to really care all that much, saying (essentially) that the wolves just stole most of the land they now claim anyway--and nearly drove those who'd been there earlier to extinction. I mentioned that it was simply in their nature to fight and destroy, that they sometimes couldn't help it, and that the only wolves worth knowing were the ones who expressed remorse over this flaw they had.
The conversation ended shortly thereafter, with the lynx going to collect her kill and head deeper into the woods; however, I was left dwelling upon the words I'd spoken: "it's in their nature to fight and destroy." They are destructive and full of rage. Every one of them. And had that bully from the other day been just a random human like I'd thought, that jogger would still be alive. Put a garou in the mix and it became deadly. Not because of me, but because of the garou. That man's death is his fault, not mine. However, that doesn't fully absolve me. In the future, before I intervene on anyone's behalf, I must make a policy of scanning first prior to employing magick.
I feel substantially less burdened by guilt now, even though it is still terrible that someone died. His death is not on my hands.
