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I attended the half moon moot (as Brings-the-Pack). (Alicia was there, but she said nothing about me. I wonder what angle she's working?) After Thane announced that something was going to happen to Edgewood and the caern, I offered to examine other places the garou resided at or valued if they'd talk with me after the moot. Post-moot, Harbor Park was mentioned, and I responded that I'd already checked and cleared that spot. Felix then asked if I'd come inspect the abandoned Library the Gnawers have, and I agreed. The rest of the moot was primarily Linnaea challenging Felix for Fostern, Slug challenging (initially Alicia and then Dakota when Alicia took a pass) for adren, and Thane announcing that he'd talked with Mouse and decided that blowing up the Queen's Tower was off the table as a viable option. (Go, Mouse!)
The next night, again as BtP, I went to the Gnawers' library, inspected it, and confirmed it seemed clear. Slug then recommended abandoning it so it would stay clear by not having anyone getting followed back. So it looks like the Gnawers are out on the streets until Briari or someone comes up with a new place to gather. (Thane mentioned an abandoned house as being a possibility. We'll see.) Slug, Felix and I chatted briefly about mind-links and the Queen. (I mentioned I needed to get to see the wraiths' bodies left over from the attack on the caern during the last full moon. Dakota's name was brought up as being one of the theurges involved in making talens from the parts.) Slug seemed concerned that any attempt at tapping that link might result in the tapper getting hit up with some bad mojo. I told him I was aware of that, and was thinking about enlisting a few spirits with command over mental telepathy to function as "fuses." Slug took that to mean I was going to sacrifice some spirits without telling them the extent of what they were being asked to do, and I assured him that was not the case.
I gave BtP a rest for a few days after that trip to the Gnawers, because everything at the cabin was giving off a blue color--paradox from so much light-bending. It went away after a day, but I used that time to read a ton of new Star Wars fan fiction online and to revisit my new (third) lightsaber build that I've been seriously neglecting. I think this one will have a white-hued blade, like Ahsoka Tano in Star Wars: Rebels. I've always found that the neutrality and independence of Kyle Katarn from the Star Wars: Jedi Outcast video game resonated with my lot as an Orphan mage. Although, yes, I'd easily be classifiable--morally--as being a Jedi as opposed to a Sith, my disdain for organizations that trample over free will and impose structure upon followers mimics my beliefs as an Orphan iconoclast who refutes the Traditions and their impositions upon how magick should be done. I think there's a purity to magick that's worked outside of the hegemony and heuristics imposed by the individual Traditions. At least for me, that is.
Yesterday I dusted off BtP and went to the caern to meditate on the forces there. My studies were interrupted by a garou named Winter, who wished to speak with me. In a lengthy, roundabout way designed to provide me background about him, he asked me whether I believed him to be a monster. He seemed deeply concerned about the ease with which he could kill, but how he regretted killing and found it difficult. And he was afraid he was a monster, and he wanted me to use magick to discern if he was or was not. A decade ago, I'd have told him he was. Heck, a few years ago I'd have told him he was. But I've found my definition of "monster" changing over these past few years. (Likely in no small part due to Emma, Salem, and Mouse.) I told Winter I did not need magick to tell that he was not a monster because he said he disliked and regretted killing and found it difficult to do so. That's a position that not many garou take: they revel in death and find it glorious and honorable, not a reluctant necessity. And I told Winter he was not alone in wrestling with these demons. He lit up a bit when I metioned he was not alone among the garou. I definitely saw a bit of myself reflected in Winter, but with Winter he's expected to kill. Ordered to kill. That's the hegemony of the garou's cultural and tribal power structures at work, subverting individuals' free wills and conscientious objections. That's why I don't belong in a Tradition. That's my concern. I couldn't vocalize the feelings of rebellion that were so strong when I was a recently Awakened mage, but it's come to me over time--perhaps a lesson long learned by Mr. Abernathy, my avatar.
Shortly thereafter, I got a call from Val. She wanted me as overwatch and an ace in the hole for when she went scouting the Queen's Tower....
The next night, again as BtP, I went to the Gnawers' library, inspected it, and confirmed it seemed clear. Slug then recommended abandoning it so it would stay clear by not having anyone getting followed back. So it looks like the Gnawers are out on the streets until Briari or someone comes up with a new place to gather. (Thane mentioned an abandoned house as being a possibility. We'll see.) Slug, Felix and I chatted briefly about mind-links and the Queen. (I mentioned I needed to get to see the wraiths' bodies left over from the attack on the caern during the last full moon. Dakota's name was brought up as being one of the theurges involved in making talens from the parts.) Slug seemed concerned that any attempt at tapping that link might result in the tapper getting hit up with some bad mojo. I told him I was aware of that, and was thinking about enlisting a few spirits with command over mental telepathy to function as "fuses." Slug took that to mean I was going to sacrifice some spirits without telling them the extent of what they were being asked to do, and I assured him that was not the case.
I gave BtP a rest for a few days after that trip to the Gnawers, because everything at the cabin was giving off a blue color--paradox from so much light-bending. It went away after a day, but I used that time to read a ton of new Star Wars fan fiction online and to revisit my new (third) lightsaber build that I've been seriously neglecting. I think this one will have a white-hued blade, like Ahsoka Tano in Star Wars: Rebels. I've always found that the neutrality and independence of Kyle Katarn from the Star Wars: Jedi Outcast video game resonated with my lot as an Orphan mage. Although, yes, I'd easily be classifiable--morally--as being a Jedi as opposed to a Sith, my disdain for organizations that trample over free will and impose structure upon followers mimics my beliefs as an Orphan iconoclast who refutes the Traditions and their impositions upon how magick should be done. I think there's a purity to magick that's worked outside of the hegemony and heuristics imposed by the individual Traditions. At least for me, that is.
Yesterday I dusted off BtP and went to the caern to meditate on the forces there. My studies were interrupted by a garou named Winter, who wished to speak with me. In a lengthy, roundabout way designed to provide me background about him, he asked me whether I believed him to be a monster. He seemed deeply concerned about the ease with which he could kill, but how he regretted killing and found it difficult. And he was afraid he was a monster, and he wanted me to use magick to discern if he was or was not. A decade ago, I'd have told him he was. Heck, a few years ago I'd have told him he was. But I've found my definition of "monster" changing over these past few years. (Likely in no small part due to Emma, Salem, and Mouse.) I told Winter I did not need magick to tell that he was not a monster because he said he disliked and regretted killing and found it difficult to do so. That's a position that not many garou take: they revel in death and find it glorious and honorable, not a reluctant necessity. And I told Winter he was not alone in wrestling with these demons. He lit up a bit when I metioned he was not alone among the garou. I definitely saw a bit of myself reflected in Winter, but with Winter he's expected to kill. Ordered to kill. That's the hegemony of the garou's cultural and tribal power structures at work, subverting individuals' free wills and conscientious objections. That's why I don't belong in a Tradition. That's my concern. I couldn't vocalize the feelings of rebellion that were so strong when I was a recently Awakened mage, but it's come to me over time--perhaps a lesson long learned by Mr. Abernathy, my avatar.
Shortly thereafter, I got a call from Val. She wanted me as overwatch and an ace in the hole for when she went scouting the Queen's Tower....
